This is where we are today and the next chapter for 2025 onward. We don't have stories to tell yet, other than God asking us to leave our security for something we have yet to fully understand.
But I can share my testimony of the process in accepting this calling from God below, in hope to strengthen anyone who is being called by God into something that requires total surrender.
Big Turnaround in 2016
Since my big turnaround in late 2016 and I willingly committed myself to become God's bondservant (read here), many events quickly unfolded and new doors were opened. Having been a deep work-addict before, where you do everything with your own human strength, the new chapter soon showed me that God also have “hands” and they are actively working.
I realized that in many ways, we have hindered God's work. When we think we contribute to God's work, many of those activities are actually hindering God's works. I think that is the situation with many churches and Christian life today.
Slow Up-Climb on the Roller Coaster
From around 2002-2023, we started to sense in our prayers that my time in the capital market was about to end. A non-Christian friend who had left the capital market joked that six years is probably good enough for me in UBS. 2025 will be my 6th year in UBS. His joke proved to be true, might’ve been an early sign from God.
The process of knowing my time in the capital market felt more like a slow build-up rather than a sudden announcement. Like seeing a shadow of what's to come.
But the slow build-up turns out to be just the beginning of a roller coaster ride with Jesus!🎢
How We Knew This Was God's Will
It was not hard to distinguish if this was God’s will or my own will: this job was a comfortable source of security and the lifeline for Kuis Alkitab.
I like the job, I’m good at it, my bosses love me and they pay me handsomely every year. We were the biggest broker in the whole Indonesian capital market. My teammates were some of the best people I’ve worked with. Very few complaints. I had absolutely no reason to leave the job.
That’s why my bosses were extremely shocked when I told them I was leaving and tried everything they could to keep me in.
On top of everything, this job has become the main and pretty much only source of support for the non-profit Kuis Alkitab since its founding 2017 - where we have 5 full-time staff fully relying on the organization for their family’s care.
If I were to leave my job, then what’s next to support the whole thing should be made clear beforehand don’t you think? That would likely mean my exit would be in 3 to 5 years time, because plans need to be made, tested and executed right?
Those were my thoughts, before my wife shook the earth with her statement, “I think 3-5 years is too long. I think God wants you to leave next year(2025).”
The Strength of Our Marriage
Now you need to know something. Different with the forward-looking Jerry, Trisya is a very firm and grounded woman. She’s very focused on the reality at hand and almost doesn’t allow herself to daydream or project too much about the future. When I start to drift too much into long-term vision, she will be the person who pulls me back down to Earth.
When she said I would quit my job next year - as in 2025, I knew she was coming from something very deep in her heart and prayer.
It sent chills down my spine. I panicked on the inside.
Because I had no plans yet to leave 2025 and God hasn’t told me to prepare anything either! We have staff under our wings, what will happen to them? What will happen to Kuis Alkitab?
The overwhelming shock and panic easily cleared any doubt that it was my own making.
Struggle to Accept the Calling
I struggled a lot because of my thoughts - Kuis Alkitab being top of mind.
How are we going to survive without my income? Because there was no other source of income. We have platforms, but they don't make enough to survive yet. The math didn't add up yet.
I was also worried for my own family, of course, but Kuis Alkitab was the number one concern because we have 5 full-time staff.
I struggled heavily in the first few months of 2024.
The point of struggle was not in accepting it as God's will. I was ready to accept it.
The point of struggle was to know what's next, what God has in plan next. Especially for me, as someone who works in the capital market, I need projections. I need a blueprint. I need a map that I can see to satisfy my rational instinct - especially for such an enormous decision.
And God wasn't giving anything.
He’s asking me to make the biggest decision in my life with no clue whatsoever.
I continued to pray, asking God for the next plan and to follow His will. I needed to know what's next, what His plan is, how I am going to support with Alkitab, what’s going to happen to these people, and also my family.
I kept asking in my prayers, and an answer came. It wasn’t what I was looking for, but it completely liberated me.
American Missionary Friend
We had an American missionary friend named Jonathan Mays, who spent more than half his life in Indonesia and is married to an Indonesian wife. God had called him to return to the United States, so he's back in America now, but we always keep in touch with each other.
In the past, He experienced similar moments where he surrendered his job and followed God without a job or income for a few years. I messaged him, asking him to share details of his story and how he went through those years when God asked him to surrender his job.
He then recommended a book called "Absolute Surrender" by Andrew Murray, a 19th-century preacher, as one of the best books he's ever read in his life. He gave me a PDF of this book.
I’ll be honest, at that point, I wasn’t looking for a book. I needed quick answers and live discussions.
I thanked him for the book but didn't touch it. Then few days later, my wife said something which abruptly brought a thought to the foreground of my mind - that maybe there is an answer in that book which John shared.
So I looked up the book, found the PDF, and opened it. After ready a few lines, I bought the audiobook version of the book and I listened rightaway.
What came out from that book was unbelievable.
Absolute Surrender Book
From the very first page, the book spoke about everything that had happened to me and explained what was happening to me.
The book spoke as if it could read my mind and the questions that were in it.
It then answered every-single-question I had about the future, the plan, what's going on, what God wanted from me, and what's inside God's mind.
It lifted a huge burden for me. After I read that book, I no longer had doubts or hesitation. I was fully in because I could see what's going on and understand what God was really asking for and why He didn't show anything about the future.
Through the book, I understood that God was asking for my absolute surrender, asking me to die in the flesh, so He could give me the full anointing of His Holy Spirit and enjoyment of His rest.
The book gave me the final clarify, the full understanding of what was happening between me and God. It didn't give specifics of the events to come. It gave something much higher than that - it showed where I was standing, where God was standing and what He's going to do in me.
And that answered me. I stopped asking questions from that point, I could move on and God also could move on and He slowly reveal more things.
On July 29th 2024, I informed my employer of my decision to leave. Me and my family are going to fully enter this new chapter in the early months of 2025.
Observation of God's Movement for 2025 Onward
From what I've seen in just these past remarkable months and years, I would like like to share some short personal observations and messages which happened in my life, and I believe will guide me and many true Christians in 2025 onwards :
- God’s moving spirit is connecting His children together. God himself is literally making introductions to unite His chosen ones who responded to His invitations.
- God's spirit is moving beyond the four walls of the church and into other areas such as the business world.
- In more ways than we could imagine, many of today's Christians are hindering God's work through their human-wisdom, over-reliance on human strengths and making the fatal mistake of trying to implement worldly principles in God's Kingdom.
- For those who responded to His invitations, God will direct them to a point of Absolute Surrender, in order for them to be emptied completely and can be filled with the fullness of the Holy Spirit. So that Philippians 2:13 might come true and be manifested
- God is blessing His children with wisdom and moving them into strategic areas to gain experience and discernments, which later would be used for His Kingdom’s expansion
- God is teaching His children to enter the unknown where He resides, walk with Him and experience the true power of God's spirit in their lives. Many will go through what seems like a downfall in the beginning, but later would turn out to be the greatest blessing of their lives.
Let's keep in touch! God bless you!
Made with Bullet