Calling to the Workplace and the Financial World

This section is long☺️, since it's a core part of my calling from God. But I'll keep it to 5 crucial testimonies:

I received Jesus into my life in 2002. Shortly after, I started receiving visions about my future and life calling from God.

One message that was clear and later undeniably confirmed, was the calling to become God's treasurer (manage God's money). This was probably somewhere in 2005-2007, before my stock market journey.

I still vividly remember the (unexpected) moment when I heard God spoke about this calling - I was walking in the parking lot of Soekarno-Hatta airport about to pick up my sister in law with Trisya.

Later on, God emphasized the message further through a book titled “Keys to Heaven's Economy” by Shawn Bolz.

That's quite my thinking back then..but I was careful not to reject God's message. I kept it in my heart and see “if this is God, then HE will do something“ - because clearly I had no power whatsoever to make such lofty vision come true.

But in 2009 God made the calling very sure and very real.

In 2008, my wife Trisya and I got married, and I was working at Commonwealth Bank, an Australian big bank in Indonesia.

In 2009, my boss became extremely ambitious and began using dishonest methods to achieve his goals. My job was selling investment products to retail customers. My boss started suggesting that we lie to our customers by misrepresenting investment products—a practice known as "misselling." I openly refused because it was dishonest and fought his pressure.

At that point, I cried out to God for a solution. During this time, while reading a finance magazine called Bloomberg Magazine and a profile of a famous money manager, God suddenly spoke to me very clearly (Rhema), telling me to go to the stock market.

I was completely stunned! Though God's voice was undeniably clear about the stock market, I had no idea how to proceed. I had no family or friends in the industry, had never owned stocks, and knew nothing about the market. While I understood investment products, the stock market was completely foreign to me.

I prayed to God, "If this is what you want, You make it happen, because I can’t."

I then googled and searched the Indonesian Stock Exchange website and listed the top 30 securities companies. I blindly printed 30 resumes and asked my wife to visit the post office and mail the 30 resumes to 30 addresses of those companies.

I then continued praying urgently for God's help, desperate to escape the pressure from my boss to trick customers.

Then the miracle happened—within TWO weeks, ONE company called. Now, when you send a resume with no specific position, unqualified experience, to a company that’s not putting any job ads, you don’t get called in 2 weeks. If you’re lucky, you get called in 6 months.

But in this instance, it happened in 2 weeks, and exactly when I was desperate for a solution to escape my boss’ pressure. And only 1 company called, never heard from the other 29 resumes. It was a clear miracle from God.

After seven rounds of interviews over two weeks, I was given a 3 months probation to try out as a junior trader! In this new role, my income increased dramatically—by 400%.

One out of 30 companies, in 2 weeks, and I got the job…..I didn’t need a calculator to figure out how low the probability of such thing happening.

At that moment, my eyes were opened about the seriousness of the life calling I received from God between 2005 - 2007. It was an undeniable confirmation from God of my calling to be His treasurer.

So I said goodbye to my old boss and my old company and entered the stock market for the very first time in my life in September 2009.

In hindsight, I was totally blind to the danger that God was sending me into. I was zealous, but very naive and unprepared. And God knew this. But He still took the risk and sent me there for a specific mission I would only fully understand 7 years later in 2016.

The capital market— ”Wall Street” in America —is the heart of money circulation in the financial world. It is the heart of Mammon, his stronghold, and God was sending me right into it.

I had zero idea of the danger I was walking into.

I was very zealous for God entering the market — “all-in” for God, believed completely, and gotten this job through prayer and extraordinary miracle. What else do I need, right?

I literally thought to myself, “I'm going to be a light in the capital market and convert the people in the market for Christ.”

But what happened later, instead of me converting them, Mamon converted me into one of his.

I seriously thought I was ready and I was “qualified”. My “ministry resume” had it all - I was born again, involved in active ministries, heard God's voice, read the Bible cover to cover, experienced miracles, had my prayers answered, found my soul mate through divine confirmation and miraculous job discovery! I thought, “Surely God sees me ready to win the capital market, why else would He sent me here.”

It didn't take long before the spirit in the market got into me. The spirit of Mamon in the market was intoxicating - but super subtle at the same time. It found its way into me through adrenaline.

The market is full of adrenaline, excitement, and competition. The money on the table was huge, but it didn't interest me as much as the excitement of winning a competition. I think the enemy also knew that and went for my natural competitive spirit.

I took the bait whole and Mamon just reeled me in like one drunken fish…

Then the wrecking effect starts….

I smashed the 3 months probation. The unqualified boy from Commonwealth Bank exceeded all expectations. My boss quickly made me a permanent staff in his trading team, promoted me and doubled my salary in less than a year.

I read a lot of books since school years, and capital market books was the main menu in university years. That propelled my early capital market career, boosted me with clients and my boss showered me with praises and projection of becoming his long-awaited successor.

My boss happened to be one of the most decorated senior trader and known as the “fierecest” leader in the Indonesian stock market.

Mamon was fueling my competitive nature and it took over the wheel without me ever knowing it.

Now I was still going to church and very active in ministry. I never left ministry. I never stopped loving God and thanking Him. I was still a “Christian” by all visible measures.

But Mamon was already in the driving seat of my heart. It had successfully awaken a monster in me which had taken me over through powerful desires.

Mamon always allows you to keep your Christian life.

Mamon will work your other aspects first and save your Christian life for the ultimate (and sometimes very public) destruction.

I became obsessed with becoming the best trader in the market. I couldn't stop talking about trading and the market. I wanted to expand my expertise to other areas. I wanted to become a grandmaster of the stock market.

And I totally neglected my wife and my marriage. I was so preoccupied in my mind, I was never present mentally at home and when I was with Trisya.

I was a complete workaholic who traded everything for personal ambition to become the best in what I do.

Our “God-Affirmed” marriage crumbled so quickly and so dramatically. What started as a promise to always do everything together, became a I-don’t-know-you-anymore.

We had money. But unlike many other women, Trisya never settled with the offer to “trade” our marriage for a big monthly allowance and a platinum credit card.

She preferred to choose separation, if I was never going to come back to her (and marry my job). She repeatedly yelled out our wedding promise during our frequent fights - that I promised her we would always do everything together. Everything. Together.

Like most men, I tried to deflect it by saying “but I'm working hard for you and the kids too, not just for me!”.

Of course it was a lie. It was all about me.

After every fight, I always did what Trisya called “2 Week Repentance”. That I changed for 2 weeks and switched back into the old me.

My career continued to climb while my marriage cratered in the background. Writing in hindsight, God knew how bad Mamon had blinded me, but instead of pulling me back, He made way and allowed my ambition to come true.

I made a big and high profile move to a local securities company in 2015 and became the second in command of the company after the CEO. I had access to everything that's going on in the company. It was what I always wanted - to be a grandmaster of everything in this business.

I thought I was going to feel super happy when I reached the top. I did feel that way for a brief moment, but then the satisfaction went away. It was gone so quickly and did not last at all.

I felt cheated and lied to. It felt like a scam. It was empty, more than anything else.

I was still digging deeper, trying to shake off the feeling and desperately hoping to find something that could please and excite me. I found none.

Trisya could sense it. She knew I was missing something. I hadn't “rediscover” God yet. I was just lost.

One night she said something that would become the “kick” that woke me up.

She said, “Papa, no matter what work you do or how things turn out, I just want you to know that me and the kids are always gonna be here with you. We're always gonna be here with you.”

Her words rang so loud it shook me and opened my eyes - that I have been going here and there, work with this person and that person, building this and building that….but the people who always stand by my side and never leave me no matter what are my family - my wife and kids.

I started to wake up from the deep sleep I was in. Call it a spell if you'd like! I started praying again (in the right way, not the self-centered prayers I'd always prayed).

I grabbed a book titled “Good or God”, by John Bevere - an American preacher whose writings influenced me a lot in the early years when I became a Christian. The book spoke a lot of things about the journey I just passed through and it made me realize what God was doing.

God had allowed me to achieve my ambition, so I would know what it tasted like. And He gave me a choice: continue that path or take up a different path - which is His path.

On December 30th 2016, after much revelation from the book and from my own quiet time with God, I made a decision - unlike 2002’s naive all-in moment, this was a very conscious, mature and voluntary decision - to give up my life as God's bondservant.

From exactly that moment, many doors were opening, future visions suddenly became crystal clear and God led me through many unexpected turns….